Bye Bye 2017. Hello 2018!

Our New Year's Pledge To You -- 

To do our best to help overcome gender polarization.


Who would've thought --- that beginning the year 2017 , as we did, immersed in the polarization of politics, we would end the year, adding gender polarization to the growing list of issues that divide people from one another.When and how will unity ever find its rightful place in the affairs of men and women?

At New Horizons, we are still after that prize; person to person and community unity on the level of exceptional, so -- the New Horizons Small "Zones of Peace" Project now announces its next contribution to the overcoming of the polarization of all peoples -- 

“Beyond Gender Tyranny” 

The Study, Programs,  Storytelling Projects and More

For Men Only! Beyond Gender Tyranny 

The Study, Part 1 

Look for details -- Coming Soon!

Wishing you a joyful and liberating New Year, 2018!

From Anastasia and the New Horizons Small “Zones of Peace” 

Board of Directors

Anastasia, Lynn, Lisa, Steve, Sue and Terry 

As The Year Ends, Considering “Forgiveness: The Gift We Give Ourselves”

This has been as Humpty Dumpty a year as I can remember, except for the year, 1998, I lost my eyesight. In the midst of one upheaval after another, few of them yet to show much in the way of a positive “we’re moving onward and upward” momentum, I was pleased an opportunity came my way to use one of my greatest strengths; adeptness at managing the process of forgiveness. By writing a semi-regular column on the topic for Frederick’s Child Magazine, I discovered I could put pen to paper, so to speak, to make good use, for others, from some of what I've gained in this area, both personally and professionally, in my close to forty-five years in the mental health field, as a psychotherapist and as an educator.

I hope you can take some inspiration from my words. There are so many upsets and troubles facing us from almost everywhere these days that it seems appropriate at this year’s ending to remind ourselves that no matter the loss, grievance or disappointment, in being our human best, we must make room in our hearts for compassion – and – forgiveness, if we are to wipe the slate clean as we head into a new year of possibilities to come. This is the heart of resilience, one of humanity’s greatest potentialities and our pathway to lifting the human spirit.

“Forgiveness: The Gift We Give Ourselves”
(Link from cover to "The Importance of Forgiveness" or go to page 18)

By Anastasia Rosen-Jones as published in …

Frederick’s Child Magazine (link from cover to "The Importance of Forgiveness" or go to page 18)
December/January 2018

Courtesy of Frederick’s Child Magazine 

The holiday season naturally turns the mind and heart to celebration. Along with this, there is sometimes poignancy; an unmet yearning dashed. We sense regret when we are reminded of losses of the year passing, opportunities unrealized. Disappointments, such as a career promotion that passed us by or a college admission to a choice university a graduating senior son or daughter may not have been granted. 

The holiday season brings a time of reflection. This is human nature, if we are attuned to our inner selves.

Big losses or disappointment and small ones come to mind, as we rev up for the joy and frivolity of the holiday season. By the time gifts and wrapping paper have been put away, overstuffed bellies and the pounds gained from sugar sprinkled cookies, rum fruited cakes and egg nog accumulated, we turn our thoughts to the coming new year. Hearts and minds, boosted by good intentions, we can’t help but take a glance or two back at what has been. 

As Christmas/Chanukah/the Haj and the Winter Solstice make way for the New Year, people consider how to better themselves. This too is human nature. The notion of forgiveness slips naturally into this contemplation. With these natural rhythms, the holiday season becomes an ideal time to introduce children to the notion of forgiveness, with its accompanying letting go of that which did not come to fruition. 

But what is forgiveness? And how does it operate?

I think of forgiveness as a gift each of us gives ourselves. In gifting ourselves, we also provide a caring gift to another; a gift that does not stop giving, as forgiveness opens the door to almost endless opportunities, unforeseen. The action of forgiving, not only enables us to acquire resilience, but allows us to accept what isn’t. Taking this route, we find ourselves, instead of mired in disappointments, resentments and depression, rising above these. 

Forgiveness can be thought of as an action; the act of coming to terms with a loss or disappointment, allowing us to place it in an appropriate perspective; a new positioning that brings unexpected rewards.  

As an action or series of actions, the work of forgiveness is akin to working through the cycles of grief. Thus forgiveness becomes a process not an event. We take responsibility to move through the denial or minimizing of our loss or disappointment, find ways to move through anger, resentment, despair or hopelessness, coming to a stage of accepting.

Working through emotions called up by a need for forgiving can be a lengthy process, depending upon the impact and significance of a disappointment, a loss or, in some cases a betrayal. 

One of the most touching acts of forgiveness I heard of recently had to do with the death of nine year old Cecilia Kathryn "Lily Kate" Powell of Lawrenceville, Georgia. 

Lily Kate, as she was called, passed away as the result of an auto accident. The driver, whose trailer plowed into Lily Kate’s mother, Jennifer’s vehicle, was charged with second degree vehicular homicide. In Love Like Lily: A Story Of Forgiveness, Lily’s family is described this way –

“Amid a family’s mourning, they learn how to forgive the man who caused their daughter’s unexpected and sudden death.”

In an equally dramatic story, the parents of Ashanti Billie whose dead body was found behind a church in Charlotte, North Carolina, have started the Ashanti Foundation with the goal of offering a scholarship to a deserving, graduating student.

These displays demonstrate heroism, demanding strength and determination, to reverse untenable circumstances. They exemplify that which parents can do best -- teach forgiveness, by example. Parental role modeling has to be number one; not only as a concept, but, more importantly, as a demonstration of what to do to move through disappointment, loss, resentment and anger. 

In contrast not forgiving brings with it broken relationships, aborted opportunities for healthy growth and development, blocked physical, emotional and spiritual well-being.  In addition to role modeling, other ways parents can assist children in developing healthy forgiveness skills are:

• Guiding children to other role models such as faith leaders;
• Talking to children about ethics;
• If children feel/think they have been injured by others, helping them  find positive ways to discuss this and heal and/or problem solve;
• Helping children to grow from such circumstances and find peace within themselves.

In these ways we foster the healthiest of growth and learning in our children. 

The first important step of the forgiveness process is to resolve to do it! Next, we can then learn the skills of the “how to.”

Anastasia Rosen-Jones, a retired psychotherapist, is the Executive Director of the New Horizons Support Network, Inc, a non-profit organization, sponsoring the Small “Zones Of Peace” Project. Ms. Rosen-Jones specializes in community development and violence prevention training. Read her bio here. 

Beyond Gender Tyranny: Press Release

New Horizons Pledges Development Of County-Wide Gender Gap Bridge-Building Support Network

The New Horizons Small “Zones Of Peace” Project, known throughout Frederick County for its Coffee House Conversations bridge-building efforts in the areas of race and citizen-police relations, has announced plans to update its former, decidedly impactful, city-wide support network approach.

From the mid-1980s into the early 21st century, New Horizons sponsored a full-fledged, highly successful, city- wide support network, addressing male female relationship problems. With ongoing support groups in Montgomery, Prince Georges and Frederick Counties and Northern Virginia, boosted by day-long educational seminars and monthly training, weekend retreats, the project became a mainstay for both men and women facing the kinds of gender imbalance presently filling our daily news cycles, prompted by sexual harassment and abuse scandals from Hollywood to New York City and all points between and beyond.

In response to this outpouring, the New Horizons Small “Zones of Peace” Project, headed by Executive Director and Founder, Anastasia Rosen-Jones, is now pledging to revitalize its support network model for Frederick County.  To this end, the organization will now seek: 1. Collaboration with other organizations, groups, agencies and individuals to help develop a Frederick County Male-Female Support Network; 2. Develop a feasibility study to chart out strategies for the project; and 3. Bring together the many voices of our community that have gender-based, power imbalance concerns.

Ms. Rosen-Jones, a retired psychotherapist with more than forty years of experience in the mental health field, suggests that these sexual harassment and abuse scandals now offer our community an occasion to raise the bar for male-female relationships in Frederick.  “Whatever is now falling out, locally, from the national tsunami of scandals and #Metoo repercussions, can become an opportunity in Frederick County,” Ms. Rosen-Jones stated. 

Ms. Rosen-Jones, who is also a member of the Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) workgroup, a project of the Frederick County Health Department’s Local Health Improvement Plan (LHIP)—an effort including, too, Frederick County United Way, the Frederick County Mental Health Association, and other local agencies and organizations—states: Frederick United Way, the Mental Health Association and other local agencies and organizations, states, 

“There is a strong correlation between what we do as ACE activists and what New Horizons is proposing here.  From recent trends revealed in the reporting of sex and power related problems in the workplace as well as elsewhere, the main victims appear to be women and mothers.  

With secrets buried deep within, victims, who may have never thought, previously, to seek help, find themselves rearing children, with the added burden of carrying unhealed trauma wounds that can impact their young ones. As our ACE task is to assist children – and – families who experience adverse conditions, we may find our community benefiting, if we offer support and guidance to adult survivors, both male and female, in some new ways beyond current provisions, outside of immediate domestic violence crises. This is what our support network will be designed to accomplish. ” 

New Horizons Support Network, Inc. is a non-profit organization that offers programs designed to teach interpersonal and community development skills and strategies through the model of its “Small Zones of Peace” Project initiative. 

Information about the organization can be found throughout this site. Also, read Ms. Rosen-Jones’ bio on her Women’s Studies research and the intersect between the co-dependent i.e. passive addict/co-dependent and the aggressive/power addict.  

For further details Ms. Rosen-Jones can be reached at: 240.409.5347 or SuperSleuthDSW@aol.com.