See blog stories linked below as well as bottom of list for tips on how to use the information that follows (i.e. what to do instead of survival-driven behaviors and more).
Also, take our "Where Is Your Compassionate Warrior Hiding? Inventory to assist you in identifying the underlying generating thinking and feelings of the "subtle violence" in your life.
Abuse, emotional of self or others
Abuse, physical of self or others
Accountability, lack of
Acting out
Addictions, chemical***
Adrenaline addictions (non-ingested chemical addiction to one’s own adrenaline, etc.)
Alcoholism***
Anger*
Angry behaviors
Attachments
Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD/ADHD)**
Avoiding emotions
Backaches
Bitchiness or irritability
Blaming
Boredom
Boredom, avoidance of
Brattiness
Breath, holding
Bulemia
Bullying
Burnout
Challenging others
Chaos, creating or seeking
Charisma*
Commitments, not keeping
Competitiveness -- can be of the Light or the Dark. Intent is the separating point.
Compulsions
Conflict, avoidance of
Conflict, creation of
Confusion
Conning others
Contracts, vague
Control , self, excessive
Controlling, of others or afraid of from others
Criticizing others
Death, avoidance of thoughts of
Death-defying
Defensiveness
Defiance
Demanding
Denial
Dependency, excessive
Dependency, rejection of
Depression**
Determination (Can be healthy and balanced or expression of excitement addiction) *
Difficulty following rules
Discounting**
Dissociating
Drama, creating or seeking
Drug addiction***
Drug dealing
Eating disorders
Ego addiction
Emotional insensitivity
Enemies, creation of
Enemies, having none
Excitement addiction
Faith, lack of
Fear that is not reality based
Feelings, avoidance of
Feelings, control of instead of working with
Feelings, denial or discounting* of
Feelings, intense*
Fighting
Fleeing
Frustration
"F--- You" Attitude Or
Getting even
Getting rid of others
Giving up
God, lack of belief in
Happiness that is not reality based
Headaches
Helplessness
Hurrying, excessively
Hyper vigilance
Inability to cooperate with others
Illnesses, all with a psychological component
"I'll do it myself" attitude
Insomnia
Intensity, emotional
Intimacy, avoidance of
Intimacy, difficulty with
Isolation
Jealousy
Judgmental, being
“Kick Me Game”
Laughter, inappropriate
Lust
Lying, Bold-faced, small and white lies
Masking (Anastasia, The Storyteller has been masterful at this one.)
Mortality, avoidance of thoughts on
Narcissism
Not forgiving self or others
Now I’ve Got You, You SOB Game
Numbness, emotional
Over-adapting
Over-eating
Partying, excessively
Passive aggressiveness
Perfectionism
Persecuting
Pleasing others, excessively
Polarizing over differences rather than seeking ways to resolve them
Power addiction
Power struggles
Power, abuse of
Powerlessness, excessive
Procrastination
Promiscuity
Psychosomatic illnesses, all;
Psychological game playing, pathologically
Punishing others
Rage
Rebelliousness
Rescuing
Resistance*
Revenge, seeking
Rigidity
Risk-taking, excessively*
Sadness that is not reality based
Seducible, being
Seductiveness
Self-centeredness
Sexual acting-out
Solitude, avoidance of
Solitude, excessive
Speed-rapping
Spiritual confusion and conflicts
Stealing
Stress
Stubbornness*
Survival motivations, excessive
Survival-Driven Behaviors, excessive or unrealistic
Suspiciousness
Talking, excessively
Temper tantrums
Trying hard
Urgency
Vengefulness
Victim, position
Violence
Void, avoidance of experiencing
Withdrawal*
Yelling
* Some of these Survival-Driven Behaviors may appear to be contradictions of one another. Examples are charisma, determination and “Enemies, creation of” and “Enemies, having none.“ However, they simply reflect that there are different Warrior styles. Passive Warriors and Aggressive Warriors are two distinct types with shades of both generally present in most of us.
** Some Survival-Driven Behaviors may also have a biological or chemical base.
*** Discounting defined -- minimizing or ignoring data (i.e. needs, emotions), rather that acknowledging, that is relevant to an individual (i.e. needs, emotions), a situation or the solving of a problem (i.e. driving on a flat tire instead of fixing it promptly).
For a discussion of the challenges of the "Aggressive Warrior" in relationships, you may enjoy reading Winning At Love, on the work, in this area, of my former psychiatrist mentor, Martin G. Groder, M.D., and his associate, Pat Webster. It is Dr. Groder's seminal work on the survivor/addict personality that is the basis for the concepts presented on this page.
Additional notes: holding with respect) = (i.e. preparatedness for a hurricane)
Copyrighted, 1998 by Marcia E. Rosen
