I'm about to take you, with a series of several articles to describe it, into the secret/sacred portals of our last Truth Or Dare GAME, GAME #5, with a tour of my day in that GAME.
Saturday, January 19, 10 a.m., Truth Or Dare GAME #5, 1:00 p.m.
I wake up this morning as bereft as I've ever been.
My Beloved cat, Cassandra, has been put to sleep and I am in the throes of trauma and grief.
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| Cassandra: In Loving Memory |
Still, it is only hours before New Horizons’ fifth monthly Truth Or Dare GAME is scheduled to begin.
And, no matter what, I am going to not only show-up for the GAME but conduct it from start to finish.
As it stands, my healing and emotional well-being are tied to being in that process, with my other devoted board members, especially today.
Furthermore, I am the only one that can take on the "Conductor’s role," formerly titled GAME Master in the old days of Marty Groder being the ultimate conductor.
To add to the misery I am feeling, the weather outside is bitter cold and we are soon to be heading into a predicted ice storm with temperatures in the single digits for days ahead.
Today I feel almost nothing but cold, in and around me.
I am bone tired from relentlessly holding Cassandra in my arms for the past several days, knowing, painfully, that soon I must let her go. I had clutched her as close to my heart as I could, as she lay dying throughout the just passed days and nights.
Realizing I was helpless to do anything more for her than had already been done, now, with her gone, I can barely think straight, my heart breaking for my dear kitty who had, in the past year, become the light of my life.
Of one thing I am certain, though, having safely delivered her to face her final moments the day prior, New Horizons Truth Or Dare GAME is now but hours away. And, without doubt, I will show up for it and take my place as GAME Conductor, no matter the emotional upheaval I am undergoing and the ordeal having just passed.
Truth and truth-telling matter that much to me!
And embracing truth, as a shared value with like-minded others who are willing to place anything and everything of themselves on the line to uphold it, spoken with respect and compassion, matters even more!
Even more so, these days, immersed as our nation has become in chaos and lies
Carrying the sounds of Celine Dion singing “My Heart Will Go On,” with me, every step forward, as a reliable way to unleash my grief, connecting it to hers in losing her beloved husband, I make my way down to my wood burning stove, stoking its embers into the blazing fire I need, now, to warm my household.
Then I make a cup of steamy chai tea and try to prepare for what lies ahead.
By GAME time, I have managed to, barely, direct myself to the business of it looming ahead.
Yet I have written up our GAME agenda, stoked the fire enough so it will last the duration and put a bowl of cereal next to my cup of hot chai tea, by my side, for the GAME’s length which will only be a mere three hours.
This makes GAME #5 actually a mini-GAME. Traditional GAMES run the course of an entire weekend – Friday evening to Sunday midday at our retreat center.
We, the New Horizons Board of Directors and myself, the present elite team of Truth Or Dare players, and myself are on our way to that beauty but still must hold this off for a time, as we refine our GAME playing skills and prepare our Harpers Ferry Retreat Center to re-open for guests.
So, dialing into New Horizons’ conference call set up, for this GAME event, I am ready to begin on my end.
It is 1:00 p.m.:
Our designated starting time has come and we are all set to go – in this new way we’ve devised, via conference call, allowing us to play our game, in good or bad weather, in health or in sickness and coast-to-coast, as we will be doing on this particular day.
Our first step, after being assured all who will be present are accounted for, is a brief check-in by individual Truth Squad members, some who have been playing New Horizons GAME for close to thirty years already.
Of course, the passing of kitty is uppermost in my heart and mind.
OMG, I've made it!
I, too, am fully present, in spite of everything, and we are set to go forward into this sanest, in my experience, of community-development processes – New Horizons Truth Or Dare GAME!
Apparently, as I have, over the past few days, been keeping the Truth Squad Community informed of the life-death challenges being faced at my house – and – earlier, on this particular day, letting them know Cassandra is gone, my loyal and loving community members have the compassion and kindness to avoid pressing me for details.
Now I am setting GAME #5 into motion!
1:15: Following a few preliminary housekeeping announcements for the day.
Now I'm asking for a round of personal goal setting for this GAME, from each person present, again my Truth Squad Members are lovingly giving me space to share what I might, when I am ready, allowing me, also, to regain my emotional strength by doing what I believe I do best –
-- conduct New Horizons Truth Or Dare GAME, that which I hungered most to do, other than write and publish while I was blind.
Taking a few minutes for myself, after the others check-in and identify personal goals for today's GAME, I acknowledge my distress about my kitty, book-ending that sharing with other items on my mind for GAME community discussion, including plans to begin bringing in new Truth Squad Members, beginning next month.
Also I am intent on my setting the stage to guide the Truth Squad in taking up the necessary processes of a not-yet-resolved community incident, from GAME #4. Once we are able to totally immerse ourselves in this endeavor, the power and profound structures and skill development that will be employed in this will become a genuine turning point in our newly revitalized GAME Community.
What we will deal with, when the time is right, is that a Truth Squad member abruptly left GAME #4 in a volatile, abusive, Trump-like temper tantrum manner, after it being brought to his attention that he had handled himself most inappropriately for a whole series of rule breaking and earlier abusiveness, prior to this GAME.
In our efforts to manage this contentious situation, well, when we are ready to tackle it, the words of Gandhi that serve as the mantra of our Small "Zones of Peace" initiative will come alive with meaning, more so than at any other time --
We do best to begin by carving out territories or zones of peace in our personal relations where violence and deceit won't be used."1:45: The GAME is on!
Thankfully, as our GAME now progresses , no one presses me for more about Cassandra, for which I am grateful.
Dealing with our renegade Truth Squad member situation and whatever will come next as GAME #5 progresses is easy next to this!!
Look for Parts II and III, "How New Horizons Truth Or Dare GAME Helps Us Offset Chaos And Strengthens Our Small "Zone Of Peace" coming soon.
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