A Commentary from Anastasia Rosen-Jones, New Horizons Executive Director And Founder
See update, below, on this topic: April 4, 2019
Well, today I am getting myself all fired up to do some writing again. About things current that relate to the various initiatives New Horizons holds dear.
My new computer is beginning to become somewhat of a friend to me, rather than a mysterious stranger sitting on my office desk.
And, enough of the chaos, regarding the Mueller Report on Russian Collusion with the Trump Administration, has settled to allow attention to other juicy dramas for ardent followers of daily headlines, such as myself, to chew on.
Now I am ready for a new round of posts, tying together, as I often do, current events and the initiatives of New Horizons.
This next series grows out of the Biden-Flores drama, allowing me to, also, weave the threads of New Horizons' "Beyond Gender Tyranny" initiative together with Truth Or Dare as another major agenda item.
Thus I am setting myself on track for some richly rewarding commentary, as I do now and then.
This week our New Horizons Board Members, plus newly added invitees into our Truth Or Dare GAME, are getting ready for another GAME event, this coming Sunday.
So, of course, with that on my mind, I couldn't be happier than to point out that what some wise folks are wanting from the Biden-Flores drama, accountability and amends rather than actual punishment, on Biden's part, mild as it is in terms of all things #MeToo, our GAME has held as a standard for decades, circa 1980s!
Check it out!
Update: April 4, 2019
This article is my first attempt at beginning to detail the powerful, life-changing, relationship-changing, potentially culture-changing New Horizons strategy known as our infamous "no abuse" rule -- and -- how and why it has had so very much positive impact over the years.
My intention is to use what I am presenting here and in related article, to prompt energetic discussion on what "moving beyond gender tyranny" means to us, at New Horizons.
If a true cultural shift, on all levels of integrity, is what YOU, as a main mover in this effort, are after, join me for discussions on gender tyranny-related subjects arising, now, out of this Biden--Flores situation.
I will soon bring the issue to my Anastasia The Storyteller Radio Show program, with a focus on New Horizons "no abuse" rule and other tried and true strategies, from our more than forty-five years of experience dealing with similar challenges. Look for details.
The central items, here, from a New Horizons perspective are:
1. The perameters, as laid out below, can effectively curtail abuse, even, the potential for abuse. Much that ends of up in violence, particularly domestic violence, could be intercepted, if New Horizons "no abuse" rule could become the norm in homes, families, businesses and organizations
(Long-time coming, of course. But here is a formula with which to make a start. I began developing it, New Horizons "no abuse" rule, in 1980 as Clinical Director of a shelter for abused women. I know the terrain well!) -- and --
2. Offenders, especially in non-criminals, non-rule breaking situations, who set out to apologize, make amends and learn from their errors in judgement, do not get raked over the coals and abused in retaliation for their misdeeds.
Yes, complaints get voiced, heard and responded to with respect!
Yes, full accountability, as indicated in #2 above, is essential!
And, yes, errors in judgement are eligible for forgiveness!
This is where dialogue versus debate comes in, in the creating of a more sustainable culture, even a Congress and White House that can truly look out for constituents.
The following excerpted from New Horizons Truth Or Dare GAME/Truth Squad Rules
The rule below is the GAME changer rule that has made the New Horizons Community Development Model famous, if not infamous!
No Emotional/Psychological Abuse = "Subtle Violence" of New Horizons Participants or Staff
(i.e. “subtle violence” = emotional abuse/discounting that evokes pain or discomfort. We added, April 2, 2019 -- Joe Biden's reportedly "inappropriate" contact with several women as an example of this.)
In action it goes like this...
- If anyone informs you that they “feel abused” (“discounted" or even "feeling uncomfortable" with your behavior toward them) = subtle violence”) by you, means that you must stop whatever you are doing – and –
- Discover what you are doing that “feels abusive,” “discounting” or "uncomfortable to the other person;
- Discover what you could do instead that behavior that has been identified as “feeling abusive,” “discounting” or "uncomfortable to others.
- No excuses or debates -- just do it!!
Question: What's your guess as to how and why New Horizons "no abuse" rule has had such impact as to make it a GAME changer?
Answer: Because in our GAME, we honor the subjective emotions of all participants, without judgement and without a need to justify one's emotions or perceptions.
No one need prove whether or not a certain behavior etc. is, in fact, truly/factually abuse, by any given outside standards.
All that is necessary is for a person to identify that they are "feeling" abused, unsafe, discounted or "uncomfortable etc., in our GAME, to warrant an adjustment on the part of another/others to ensure that comfort and safety for all is maintained.
Use our rule in your home or work and prepare for an adventure!!!
If you dare!
Conclusion:
If you are peace oriented, don't you wish the whole world could act on this principle/practice?
One more reason for YOU and your friends
Also, find out how you can play New Horizons Truth Or Dare GAME -- and -- even become a certified GAME Conductor Intern.
